I’ve just published my first guest post at another blog! It’s very exciting. You can find it here at Hoyden About Town.
Talking about asexuality in discussions of feminism (and all its intersectionalities) is not the easiest task. As a recent thread at the high-profile blog Feministe has once again shown, attempts at any form of meaningful discussion around asexuality and feminism tend to degenerate into 101-style questioning which then rapidly becomes hostile, challenging asexual people to prove or legitimise their identity or denying it outright.
Being an ally means talking to people about asexuality and accepting their identity as they describe it. It means asking questions only when you’re genuinely interested in hearing the answer. If your mindset is already fixed at “I don’t quite understand x, therefore asexuality cannot be valid,” then do everyone a favour and just walk away.
Being an ally to asexual people means recognising that asexual people suffer oppression in the form of invisibility and intolerance every day. Our whole society is so centred on sexual desire, so intensely focussed on sexual behaviour as the central aspect of our identities. We’re lucky if we can come out to someone and that person actually knows what “asexual” means without us having to explain it.
Head over there to read the whole post! I’m quite proud of it.